Crafted with nature's grittiest ingredients and sourced from highly skilled neanderthal farmers, these oldest pressed juices are meant to restore and invigorate.
May include trace amounts of dirt and entire branches.
Juice Served There Since 40,000 BCE. Stop by the Time Travel Mart or order online for stone smashed wellness.
P.S. added benefit of stress relieving slime in each bottle!
Relabeled to meet tomorrow's standards by Carin Rogoff
