Dark Ages Soap – Time Travel Mart
Attention: June 25 - 27, our Time Travel Marts in Echo Park and Mar Vista will be closed for a brief time jump. Our online portal remains open 24/7, no matter the era!

Dark Ages Soap


Approved by the Guild of Bathhouse Keepers, Dark Ages is the go-to soap manufacturer for those who insist on the occasional bathing. For best results apply to clean skin with a generous slathering of grime or mud. Remember: Cleanliness can lead to terrible health and demonic possession, so it's best to be filthy, healthy and happy.


Dark Ages Soap - "It dulls as it dries."


Imported from the past by J Ryan Stradel.   Relabeled to meet tomorrow's standards by Laurice Feller.



WARNING: Bathe once a week maximum.